Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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