when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
