I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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