how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
