We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
