is your mom at the bar?
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
