He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
