Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
