Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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