What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
