This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
You took a bar mat shot.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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