I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
