my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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