Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
