There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
The ass gains better be worth it
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