If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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