He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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