my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Randomize
