So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize
