Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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