Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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