and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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