this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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