miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
