Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
