don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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