I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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