mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
