Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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