I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
