you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
