someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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