Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
