apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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