I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
