Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
