I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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