I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
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