I heard we made out
wrigley field is MILF paradise
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Randomize
