I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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