The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
