i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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