Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
