I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
