google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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