I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
