no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
