I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
