Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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