You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Randomize
